So Kelli Stapleton was charged with an attempted suicide-murder this Thursday. She’s been the primary caregiver of her autistic daughter for 14 years.
Thursday evening evening, Stapleton and Isabelle, the 14-year-old daughter, who is often called Issy were found unconscious in a car. Isabelle still remains in the hospital unconscious till this day while officials are trying to figure out the motives of her mother. Stapleton is jailed without bond in northern Michigan. She was arraigned Thursday in a Benzie County court on one count of attempted murder after being released from the hospital.
You’ve got to love our justice system, eh? Even the psychiatrist have a name for something like this. It’s called “caregiver fatigue”. Caregiver fatigue is extreme stress
from devoting one’s life to a sick or ill family member. Let’s look at this from the mother’s point of view for a second. She didn’t ask for an autistic child. She devoted her life to taking care of her daughter, but can only take it so much. This is why people put seniors in senior homes. So she has a kid and is now bound to the child forever. What a card to be dealt.
Stapleton of course, loved her daughter and decided to take care of her for all those years, but sometimes there’s only so much stress people can take. So much that her life isn’t worth all this stress. So what are her options? She doesn’t even know her options. The only options she can think of is either eliminating the stressor (her autistic daughter) or eliminating herself. In this case, she chose both.
Prosecutors don’t understand any of this. They just assume she’s “evil”(whatever that means). What was the point of putting her in jail? That didn’t make things better for anyone. Who benefits from sending Stapleton to jail? Stapleton obviously doesn’t. It only makes life worse for her, who already feels bad about her life. How about Isabelle? Isabelle is not going to get out of the hospital faster if her mother is in jail. The only thing I can think of is preventing her mom from trying to kill her again, but that can be arranged in another way.
How about understanding the stress of caregiver fatigue and creating a program that deals with these children? Even psychiatrists are guilty of backwards thinking of completely blaming the mother. In an article from the Daily News, we have the following :
Birmingham-based psychiatrist Gerald Shiener said caregiver fatigue can be a difficult problem for those who are in charge of a disabled relative.
“It can be overwhelming,” he said. “It can cause severe depressive symptoms and cause a depressive syndrome, with an overwhelming sense of hopelessness.”
Caregivers also may struggle with feelings of being ostracized or isolated, said Judy Kotzen, medical social worker for Beaumont Health System.
It’s important for caregivers to set aside time for themselves and seek help when needed, Shiener said.
“When a caregiver neglects themselves, that’s when they get overwhelmed, that’s when they feel guilty, that’s when they feel a sense of resentment, that’s when they get discouraged … and that’s when something bad happens,” he said. – Originally from the Daily News
I mean seriously, why are they putting all the blame on the mother? It’s the mother’s responsibility NOT to neglect herself? How can she not if she has to make sacrifices in her life? We don’t think when something comes flying at us, we just blink as a reflex. Emotions are reflexes. When something emotional happens, our emotions emerge subconsciously without us having to think about anything.
Not everyone has the tools to deal with certain emotions. Instead of stating the obvious and punishing people, wouldn’t it be better to educate them? To help them obtain these tools?
What do you guy’s think? Feel free to comment and give your opinions!
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